To speak or not to speak…


Hey pals… I’m here again… And this time with a very very intresting and delicate topic… I know most of us have been in this situation before.. And some have not *hard to believe right??*

Well here is what I’m talking about..

A few days ago, I was in my room with a troublesome friend of mine *hope she doesn’t see this…¤smiling¤…* and I tuned into a radio program that was going on… It was all about a girl liking/having feelings for a guy and being bold enough to walk up to him and say it..

However she wants to put it..like….

“I love you…talk your own” ¤rotfl¤ or better still being serious and telling the dude ‘I really do like you..can we hang out sometime??’

However she puts it… The main bone of contention is….. How many girls are this brave?? Would you rather die in silence??…

The host of the show kept talking about our african traditions and how its not in our culture to do things like that…

……”but coming to think of this.. Most of the things we do these days are way out of tradition like trousers, brazillian hair etc” this was the arguement of the invited guest..

And she went on… ” What’s the worst that could happen… You spill your guts to the guy and he tells you either YES or NO… If its a NO, you move on, at least you have relieved your mind of the burden of ‘what could have happened’..

If its a YES.. You would also be satisfied.. Fact is that some guys can be so shy that they might actually need help.. ”

Shola liked this guy..like seriously… But she said nothing about it.. Then the guy happened to travel out she was still liking while he had found someone over there and engaged her.. On returning to the country, the fiancee turned out to be her best friend…she was heartbroken but could do nothing about it.*sad right*

And for the guys..what would you do if a girl walks up to you and says she likes you and wants to hang out??

Clara has been in love with dayo, she couldn’t take it anymore…one day, she walked up to him and told him how she felt…. This had to be real as she had unknowingly spoken to dayo on the phone before, and told him all about this guy she was crazy about, not knowing who she was talking with…

While she was spilling her guts, dayo was busy thinking seriously…

Could she have an ulterior motive..could this be real…etc thinking of all the negative reasons.. And not just because she truely liked him??…

Hmmmm…. so girls…the debate is on…

Would you rather keep quite and have premature ventricular contractions (increased heart rate) anytime you see him..putting yourself at a risk for hypertension..*smiles*.. Or would you just tell him to free your mind live a ‘healthy’ life????

And guys would you rather think up all the possible negative reasons why, than to just think of 1…only 1 positive reason???

Ensure you leave a comment with your opinion…*my troublesome friend agrees with the invited guest…..*

I’ll be waiting to hear from you…

Tchao

#kalmone

    1. https://kalmnkool.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/002.jpg

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  • 52 thoughts on “To speak or not to speak…

    1. adeola says:

      I will zip ♍Ɣ mouth short, en tell wich guy, lol, cnt do it o, but wuld do tins d̶̲̥̅̊ª† would atract d guy 2 ♍ƺ, body language, lol

    2. I once had a gf *female frnd*who walked up 2 me n ws lyk ‘guy y r u dis wicked?’ *shocked* I aske her wat ws d problem. And she boldly said she luvs me bt I refused 2 notice her feelings. I tot it ws a joke. Bt later I decided 2 gve it a trial. We had a fling n later I ran away. Reason ws dat dis girl ws ready 2 kill anytinin skirt dat come arnd me. I ran 4 my lyf ooooo

    3. Rhymz says:

      I think it boils dwn 2 personal opinion. While some guys might b thrilld abt a lady making d first move, others might be appalled. Personally, I wnt speak out esp whn I am nt sure hw d guy feels. Abeg abeg abeg, I prefer a guy to make da first move. Dats d fun.

    4. Frances says:

      Hmmmmm realli nyc topic Tega, i feel speakin awt wont b a bd idea @ least 2 ease d load bt it has 2 b done wit a lot of SENSE

    5. Wow……what a day… Thanks y’all for your comments n views…. I really had fuuuunnnn…I know you did also… I m very very grateful…… Luv u all….

    6. Omri says:

      *in a serious tone*….Sotee….iyam nt a nigerian…iyam nt a half caste either…..will be 31 this month….so wats it gonna be

      1. Omri says:

        Its important that I however state it clearly here that am single and opened to being approached *hehehe*….asking out is damn difficult…need a helping hand(s) *winking»In»a»Seductive»way*

    7. izzy says:

      There is absolutely nothing wrong with a gal toasting a guy. Its very brave and it points out to d guy dat dis chick is a go-getter, and any sensible man wld love a brave go-getter gal.
      I am all for female empowerment. Dis is a new age, where women shd no longer allow demselves be bound by silly customs and freedom of expression is now a welcome development….. Any law/custom dat was made by man not God, wld only be broken by man and not God.
      It is from little tins like dis, dat we cld finally get rid of all our other silly customs, dat keep women in captivity. Na our hand e dey o!!

    8. SIR PRINCE says:

      Hmmmmmmmm!!! Why can’t d ladies express themselves… Biblically, we re both of d same IMAGE, medically, we both have emotion centre , legally,we have same RITE and socially , we both CLUB on d same ground¤laughing¤. If U̶̲̥̅̊ don’t blive in these principples then U̶̲̥̅̊ must be looking out for ventricular shutdown 2ry to STROKE…case dismissed

    9. Soteey says:

      Crsly tho grls dnt toast ooo..m very crs nw..no sh*t..ve seen it backfire mor tyms dn it hz worked..d only xceptions r 1. if d guy z nt Nigerian(half caste no follow) n 2.If he’z ovr 30 den u cn proceed*thumbs up

        1. Go izzy. Go izzy. Go!!!!
          Agree wf u! Doesnt rili min u av 2 spill it out lik’a dummy tho.. Buh den, ur actions cud spik 4 u..
          Women empowermnt it is…

        2. Soteey says:

          Any chic dt doubts me shud jst go n try n toast or “spill guts” outsyd d criteria I jst gave…den come n report 2 me..I swear u’ll regret ur lyf..lol..4get all dese 1s guys r commentin here o gingrin female chykers..go 1st n try ur luck I dare u..u’ll b sori
          My theory z der’s nothn guys enjoy mor dn d thrill of d hunt..n 1ce u take dt away 4rm him ders gon b problems..no joke..However!der r dose females(lyk urs truly)dt enjoy a hunt demselves..der r 1000 ways 2 trap ur prey(wink wink)..dnt go n jst strt chykin biko

        3. leo says:

          Lol… Katie just called thousands of guys dummies… Nice… Let’s see hw many relatonships start wen guys realize dat.

        4. @leo, huh? U misunderstud ma comment… Meant d ladies shdnt go spillin it awt lik’a dummy…!! Its best ha actions spik 4 ha…
          @soteey, i knw a few pips its wrkt 4 tho.. Buh den, pheew!!

        5. leo says:

          I interpreted it clearly… Logically if ladies act like dummies wen “they spill it out” then d guys equally act like dummies wen they do d same… So think of a world wit no dummies

        6. Holy moses! @leo, its alwz bn d guys askin a gal out yh? Buh den if d lady wants 2, i min she shdnt go abt using ol dem “toastin lines” wld rili b awkwrd. Dts wah i meant…

        7. leo says:

          Hey hey… Just wanted to pull u gals out of ur shell a lil… The truth is u gals shudnt toast cuz it spoils d xcitement en cud be dangerous… Buh who says u gals can’t handle it

        8. leo says:

          I agree wit u a 100%… Buh u ladies cud @least try to include sign language in ur actions 🙂

    10. rytar says:

      I have a saying…”Speak up while u r breathing steady,else we’ll mistake ur opinion for a hiccup later”
      Fuck tradition,fuck society,fuck statistics,fuck protocol cos in the end they won’t win or lose wit u

    11. Joel says:

      Hmmmm….interestin topic. Personally,, dnt hav any problem wit dt. It only shows how much d gal lyks d guy….bt hey,it myt work ou….or myt nt. Bt u neva knw until u try…

    12. leo says:

      The truth is dat it happens all d time, some hav xperinced it some havnt. Buh I think d ladies love to leave d hard/stressful part of asking out to d guys en d guys feel awkward for 5mins wen a lady ask them out buh afta dat they wud feel relieved (if they like d lady) cus let’s face it evryone likes d easy way out… Dnt ask me wat d guys wud feel if dey dnt like d lady… Smh

    13. Vee says:

      To speak or not to speak. I say to ‘speak witout speakin’. Its all abt tact. And d guy wt an average iq knows a greeeen lite anytime. If he feels d same way, den….. Otherwise, go and cure urself of d ‘feeling’ (whatever that is)

    14. Omri says:

      HIAN!…..to be very sincere on the matter *clearing ma throat*….we backwards in dat capacity…I mean I’ve gat 5 sisters..but do girls need to be verbal about it….coz am 99% sure dat 90% of girls got their bfs attracted to them by their actions(which dy faked/showed/acted @ d earlier stages of their encounter)…so for me…girls don’t need to spill their GIT to that level..(Except shez hooked on cannabis)…d way she gesticulates/acts/talks to him(or me as d case maybe *hehehe)…but if a girl MUST go there…..she has to be @least 89% sure that he feels same way…because in the end the morale of the story is to own-up to a man that’s mature,intelligent and worth it…so u don’t get crushed…

    15. jay. says:

      I see nuffin wrong in telling a guy how you feel about him, if we have to stick to africa culture, then technology should not be welcomed.LOL.

    16. Bery Ujene jnr says:

      Hmmm! I wouldn’t say I have a problem with this, but common on….. We r Africans n Nigerians, its meant to be the guy and not the other way round. Have been in that shoe severally, so am used to it. I would have been called a **** if I dated all the girls dat asked me out! And I also know when its hard for the guy to make the first move, But people…. What’s YOURS will one day come to you!!!!!!!!

      1. Peee says:

        So how do you know d 1 out of 10 who will not look down on ya? I believe dere are more subtle ways of showing d ‘green light’ wivout xactly “toasting” d guy… Just ma point of view

    17. iamthedemigoddess says:

      Me I no fit Ooº°˚˚˚°º! I’ll rather die in silence! Even if the boy hot pass Brad Pitt! *and u know how much I love fine boys*
      As for Shola, Kpele Oº! The boy was simply not meant for her!!!
      My right man will come, and he’ll sweep me off my feet! I know for sure! Tega sweets, my sister in blogging, u did an awesome job!

    18. Arrrrggghhh, so tega am troublesome yh? Oops! I jst spilled it out.. Ok, y’all now knw ma opinion. Dnt c it as a biggie tho. #smyls.

    19. Peee says:

      I wish every1 knows how much I’ve been frustrated and maligned over dis blog! 4 d simple reason zat I read it b4 it was published, can u imagine?.. Now it is free meat 4 err1 buh I still get 2 serve a punishment… D price of having evil frnds #sobbing… So I think its really cool and brave and no big deal 4 d babe 2 spill her guts buh personally, I know I will so die in silence cos I simply can’t do it. Maybe cos of pride, maybe fear of rejection wchever way I thank God I’ve not bin in dat situation!!!! As always 1 ♥ kalmnkool1

    20. J-prince says:

      Talkin from a dude’s point of view,I think when a lady walks up to a guy,its real and she has spent countless sleepless nights b4 takin such a step……….so if am in such a situation,I’ll kinda slap myself on both chicks to be sure I aint dreamin….and if I have feelings for such a lady,it won’t hurt to work sometin out

    21. Mayowa says:

      I rly dnt av any problem on ds issue cuz I’ve actually had a girl walk up 2me & tell me hw she felt ’bout me & we ended up hookin up

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